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Showing posts with label Gramercy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gramercy. Show all posts

Friday, November 5, 2010

Il Forno: "Fa schifo."


There is pretty much nothing to say about  besides that it sucks and is also inordinately huge. I could not imagine it filling up if it was a quarter of the size it is, but it is like, fucking enormous and L-shaped. If you want tons of privacy to talk about really private shit without anyone around, I suggest coming here and ordering like, a soda or a pepperoni roll and sitting around back in the huge ghost town of a back room. If you want pizza, I would say you should probably go somewhere else.


This slice was a little worse than mediocre. It was cooked okay, but the ratios were all off--there was too much cheese and too little sauce. The dough was not nearly salty enough and was a flavor vacuum, a total .

Rating:


Il Forno - $2.45
343 2nd Ave (at 21st)
New York, NY 10003

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Pizza Pub: "I can't believe I kind of like this place."


When Dan and me approached this place, I walked up to those teenagers and said, "Hey, just so you know, I'll be taking a picture of this pizzeria in a few moments, so if you don't want to be in it, do you mind getting outta here for a few seconds?" And then the boy on the right said, "Oh we're alllll up in it." And made some kind of sexual gesture at me. Okay, little dude. Every time I start liking kids again, I run into some teenagers and get bummed about Larval Humans once again.

Speaking of kids, I want to officially rescind the statement from the inside back cover of Slice Harvester #2 which said, "Slice Harvester is Pro-Death and Anti-Birth!" I was in kind of a sour mood that day, and some bullshit yuppies and their entitled shit kids where running rampant in the Staples I was in making photocopies. But we are approaching the death day of a very dear friend of mine right now, (and in fact, he died the night Barack Obama got elected so I always kind of consider Election Day to be the day to get sad and then I realize that the date of Election Day changes every year), and I am reassessing how worthwhile it is for me to joke around about stuff like that. So even though I think we can take it as a given that I am not actually "Pro-Death," and was obviously just "freakin' out squares," I'd still like to rescind that statement.

And I have quite a few reasons not to be "Anti-Birth" either. Like all of my friends' beautiful children. Or more recently, a blog written by a friend of a friend's 9 year old son that is absolutely so amazing. So yeah, I still won't advocate that people should keep breeding, because fuck the senseless reproduction of our horrid species. But like, don't feel bad about having a kid or something, because that kid might be awesome!

Anyway, enough hippie crap, on to (not to be confused with )! This is the first pizza place I've been to that has a full bar, although that one place in the basement of Penn Station had more draft beers. The pizza here was not very good, but it did cause me to make a new "tag" for my entries, which is the "Great Deal" tag. This tag will be applied to any slice with a rating of 4 or higher that is a great deal, either because of the size, the price, or as is the case here, because of the things you can get with a slice.


Tacky design and corny atmosphere aside, an entire pie and a pitcher for $24 is kind of a great deal! That's a slight buzz and a decent meal your you and a friend for fourteen bucks each if you each tip $2 because you aren't barbarians.


This slice was a major 'meh'. It was really thin and insubstantial, and didn't quite have enough sauce. But the sauce was good and the dough was good quality and the cheese was good and it was cooked well. Dan said, "this is acceptable, but it's not really blowing my mind," which I think pretty much sums it up. I was totally happy to eat here and had we been drinking, I would've been happier to drink a pitcher with Dan, split a whole pie, and talk endless shit about the world.

Rating:

The Pizza Pub - $2.00
294 3rd Ave (22nd & 23rd)
New York, NY 10010

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Adriana Pizzeria: "Dan says, 'Look how shiny the crust is... it's scary.'"


After our positive experience at Mariella Pizza Dan and I were looking forward to hopefully chewing on some decent slices. But as soon as we took one look at Adriana Pizzeria, Dan turned to me and said, "I don't know about this, Colin."


And the slice was HORRID. It was really greasy and tasted just like those huge tubs of fake butter spread that they have at every punk house because it is vegan and the entire tub is like, forty cents. Or maybe it tasted like that nasty Papa John's "butter" sauce. Whatever it resembled, it was totally gross. Like TOTALLY gross. And it was undercooked and chewy and there wasn't enough sauce and all you could taste was this overwhelming synthetic grease flavor. This slice was so gross. We didn't finish it.

Rating:


Adriana Pizzeria - $2.52
253 3rd Ave (20th & 21st)
New York, NY 10010
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